Frustration and disappointment swept in as I hung up the phone. A long awaited, highly anticipated, business deal had been delayed – AGAIN! This time, an approval needed from a municipal council was, in our opinion, unjustly turned down. Here we go again – more time, more money, more delays.
I haven’t always handled disappointment well. I have been one who would ignore what was really happening to me on the inside, emotionally. My way of coping has too often, been one of shoving feelings aside and driving on.
I was raised to never quit or give up. This resilience has been a tremendous gift to me from my parents. That practice of pressing through the quitting points and not giving up has served my family, our business and community well.
At the same time, I still needed to learn how to process my emotions in a way that was real and genuine. My stoic approach made it more difficult for my wife, kids, friends and colleagues to connect with me. I have had to learn (an ongoing process) to give myself permission to experience what I am feeling. Not an easy thing to do, for many reasons.
Over the years, God has tempered my emotional denial. Mostly He has used my wife Cathy, my kids, and a few close friends to help me grow up and mature in this area.
With that in mind, here is a summary of God’s reminder to me this past Saturday morning as I processed my disappointment.
1. Disappointment is real. It is part of the human experience.
Just like King David in Psalm 31, we need to learn to be real and honest with our emotions. Let’s not be afraid to experience the disappointment and the opportunity to have God join us in the midst.
2. Seek 1st His Kingdom and His righteousness.
Jesus reminds us in Matt 6:33 NLT that He and His kingdom are bigger than the things of this world that disappoint us.
3. He will use all things for His good.
In Romans 8:28 NLT God reminds us that He will take all things and use them for good. This is a promise – even when we can’t see it or feel it.
4. Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
Matt 5:44 NLT reminds us that when we face those who oppose us, we are to respond as Jesus would toward them, remember not to ‘pay them back’ and pray for them. Although my situation was not a “life or death” opposition as so many in our world are facing, I still needed to adjust my attitude to one of extending God and His kingdom to those opposing us.
A Maverick Application…
- Think back over the last few weeks or months. What has disappointed you?
- What was your response? Did you acknowledge it; process it; learn about yourself and others through it? Or, did you “just move on”?
- Invest some time in Psalm 31. With your disappointment in mind, read the Psalm slowly and ask the Holy Spirit to inform your thoughts and feelings.
- What is He telling you about Him, about yourself, and about others?
