Do you have “bad breath”?

This is the 4^th in our 8-part series on being transformed as a small business leader.

Unaware! That was my summary as I sat across from this leader. They were woefully unaware of their blind spots - unaware of the negative impact on others around them. He was unaware of how his self-righteousness has created a negative culture, a disengaged team, a loss of best ideas and innovation that would significantly help improve processes, customer experience and profit.

I was recently listening to Francis Chan talk on the danger of being self-righteous. He asked the question, “Have you have ever had anyone tell you that you have bad breath?”

If you are like me, outside of waking up in the morning with an absolute horrendous taste in your mouth, you are usually blissfully unaware of your breath… blissfully unaware of the impact on those around you. I suspect we’ve all had feedback highlighting the need to “do something”.

The lack of self-awareness is like bad breath. You don't know you have it until someone close informs you of the problem.

“If you think you know it all, you’re a fool for sure;
real survivors learn wisdom from others.”

Proverbs 28:26 MSG

It has become clear to me that for transformation in Christ to occur, we must become more and more self-aware – more aware of own nature apart from Christ, more aware of the beauty of our redeemed natures in Christ.

As a leader, what do you do when you are unaware of the impact of you on yourself and those around you? Ask them!

Ask them…”I need your help! ”What’s one thing I am unaware of that I can do differently to serve you better?” “What’s been the impact on you?”

Note: It is essential to learn how to ask in such a way that it creates the space for transformation in you and those around you. In Luke 18:9-14 NLT Jesus provides an unequivocal frame on how we are to ask those around us for feedback. We can ask with a spirit of a “know it all” like the fool in Proverbs 28:26 MSG or we can choose a humble posture like the tax collector. 

My personal journey of creating space for Christ to do His transforming work in and through me has been one of choosing the posture I will bring to feedback from God and others. For most of us, feedback re: my lack of awareness regarding and attitude and or action and the ensuing impact on others, is usually met with an internal resistance.

My need to protect myself, to be right, to manage, justify and reshape the feedback… so that I can feel better about myself… seems to never be far from the surface. 

Paul’s words in Romans 7:24-25 NLT echo loudly. Apart from Christ and His merciful rescue, I am a miserable person…. lacking the desperately needed input and feedback from those close to me.

I cannot overstate the impact of the ongoing and what seems to be the never-ending-setting-my-pride-aside story in my own life at home, in business and in community. Profoundly grateful for God’s grace and mercy, I continue to ask for an ever-increasing level of awareness of my impact on those He has placed around me.

Are you grateful for the same?

A Deliberate Application:

• As a business leader, how aware are you of your leadership impact on those around you at work and at home?
• When is the last time you asked them – genuinely asked them- to help you be more aware of your impact on them?
• As you consider growing in your awareness by getting feedback, what thoughts and feelings are you experiencing?
• Bring these thoughts and emotions to the One who made you. In humility and submission, offer them to Him as a “living sacrifice”. Romans 12:1 NIV
• Ask them…and then appropriately…do it!!
• Who will you share this with? 

DeliberateU-TUBE:

Grow in your self-awareness. Choose God and his transformation of you at work and at home.