Last week was really tough. This business owner was feeling the heavy weight of a necessary decision to release a close family member from his business. The personal implications for the decision were significant. As much as he tried many times to bring helpful motivation for healthy change, it eventually became clear that it was not going to work. This person was not ready to do the personal leadership work needed to lead self and others well. It was time to move on.
As owners and leaders, if not careful, we can be lulled into very unhelpful thinking as we engage with family and friends in our business. We can make serious mistakes that are based on unrealistic assumptions. We think that because the person is my brother, father, mother, sister, son, daughter, extended family or friend that…. “Of course we can make it work”. Not necessarily factual!
At the same time, I can clearly say that engaging the appropriate family members and friends in our business has been a significant joy. While there have been many natural challenges, I can unequivocally endorse engaging family and friends.
If you are not committed to doing the work of faith, hope and love as you engage with friends and family in business then….as I heard someone recently say…
“Run for The Hills!”
Here are 10 questions to help you assess whether you and your friends/family have the capacity to successfully navigate being team members:
- How clear is your business vision: your purpose, your values, your BIG dreams?
- Are you living out a true example of what's most important for you and your team?
- Are you, your friend/family members willing to do whatever it takes to honor each other as committed members of the team? Even when it becomes challenging?
- Are your family and friends clear that no-one is exempt from living the values of your company?
- How does ego impact you and/or them?
- Are you both equipped to navigate well the many challenging conversations that will come your way?
- Are your friends and family clear that, should they choose not to do the hard work of living out your company’s values, they will be asked to offer their services elsewhere?
- Is the role for your friend and/or family member a solid “fit” for them?
- Have you been tolerating inappropriate attitudes, behaviors or poor performance from a team member that is a friend or family member?
- Do you have healthy boundaries between work, home and community?
Without a solid commitment to doing this work, you will be multiplying angst and frustration at work, home and community.
What’s your response to the questions? Are you willing to do the work? Are they? If not, then…” run for the hills”!
A Deliberate Application:
- Read and reflect on Matthew 6:33 in the context of the questions.
- What are you sensing God ask of you?
- What next steps do you need to take?
- Who will you share this with?
